Which it might be an post-solstice echo of consumerist culture foisted on unsuspecting masses of sheeple by a ruthlessly bottom line-driven consortium of jewellers, greeting card manufacturers and chocolateers, but there’s also a chance that it isn’t – a possibility that the wise man ignores at his peril while performing risk/reward calculus.
Which in our case meant three single red roses (each with a spray of baby’s breath), three greeting cards and one little trifling jewel box with an itty-bitty necklace in it.
Because while your correspondent might be struggling with his algebra three decades after high school, when it comes to risk/reward calculus he is both current and proficient.
Update: To be filed under the “that’d be strange if it was possible” heading (and as though we didn’t have enough to concern ourselves with, what with prices going up) the UK Telegraph is putting out that all of us flower-buying wage slaves are also bad for the environment:
The Valentine’s Day bouquet–the gift that every woman in Britain will be waiting for next week–has become the latest b?™te noire among environmental campaigners.
Latest Government figures show that the flowers that make up the average bunch have flown 33,800 miles to reach Britain. . . .
Environmentalists warned that “flower miles” could have serious implications on climate change in terms of carbon dioxide emissions from aeroplanes.
Which they ought to figure out a more efficient way to get flowers to Britain, considering that the entire world is only 24,901 miles in circumferance, meaning that no two points in the world could be more than 12,500 miles away from each other as a crow flies since crows – being stupid birds – habitually avoid using mileage-reducing great circle routes. Like flower-carrying airliners do.
Roger that, Lex! Sidenote: My wife and I met on the eve of this date, and shared our first kiss just after midnight. Just a few weeks later, I married her, on March 19. That was 14 years ago, and it just keeps getting better. So this day means more than most to me
“…it might be an post-solstice echo of consumerist culture foisted on unsuspecting masses of sheeple by a ruthlessly bottom line-driven consortium of jewellers, greeting card manufacturers and chocolateers…”
Of course it is, unfortunately. Like Boss’ Day and Secretary’s (whoops, I mean Exec Asst) Day. Nevertheless, heaven help the poor sap who doesn’t come home with something, *anything*.
We have a 3-card limit, not including ones from Wilson the dog. And sometimes we get all extravagant and set a spending limit of $2.14. Fosters creativity.
I live in Illinois, where there is currently two feet of snow drifted across my driveway. However, I personally am currently in Bethesda, MD, taking a training class. I thought I was so clever sending my wife’s Valentine’s Day flowers to her workplace, where all her colleagues could see that she’d gotten them. I hadn’t anticipated that she might not be able to get to work, or that the conditions would be such that the delivery folks wouldn’t be able to get them all delivered.
One VD I had managed not to get to the store until late. No VD cards, at least not “To my Loving Wife” kinds. What to do, what to do? I bought a bag of a dozen of the little cards that the kids have to buy when the teacher says “If you buy one for someone, you have to give everyone one”. I signed ALL of them, and hid them around the house, bought some candy, and told my wife she would win a prize if she found them all. Hey, it worked!
Hey RonF, I’m out in IL as well, ~20 miles W of Chicago. I hear ya about the snow. Had just enough gas in the snowblower to clear the driveway to get the car out to get more gas to clear more snow.
Back to the thread, sorry.
The distaff side says Lex has wonderful taste. The “itty-bitty necklace” filling “one little trifling jewel box” is exquisite.
*sigh* We don’t celebrate Hallmark holidays at our house.
I think the brits counted each flower as flying on it’s own trip.
Divide 33,800 by 12 and you get a much more reasonable 2,816.6 miles.
Back to the algebra book!
(PS, it was sneaky of them to express it that way – intentionaly so I’m sure)
Byron,
You’ll be celebrating your Anniversary on my Birthday. Also happens to be the day the swallows are said to come back to San Juan Capistrano.
I thought I was close to a record of non-wartime quicky marrying, First Date July 5th, Married September 5th (19+ years ago.) You’ve got me beat though.
Sometimes you just know when it’s right.
Yup, Idaho, you sure do. At least I did…wife said she woke up a couple of months after we got married, looked at me, and asked herself, “Did I really marry this man? In less than 2 months of knowing him?” I just smiled…One of us was 100% sold on the notion, and was going to keep the faith. It worked, and we look forward to enjoying our 14th anniversary.
…but there?
…but there’s also a chance that it isn’t – a possibility that the wise man ignores at his peril while performing risk/reward calculus.
Yup. I’ve discovered this year that I don’t care if it’s a “made up” Holiday, I still wanted the romance. Unfortunately, I didn’t get it. Apparently he’s not a “wise” man…
And as Sandi said, you have exquisite (and very romantic) taste. The Hobbit is a lucky lady.
re the 33.8k miles
Cmon Lex, you know they don’t offer 6th grade geography in Journalism School.
Or maybe dem flowers flew SouthWest?
b2
#3 Ronf
I’m still laughing. At least you tried. I’m in trouble.
Lovely “little trifle” Sir; I’m sure the Hobbit was properly pleased. Having been sick since Tuesday, my poor hubby has had to scramble since NOT being at work has kind of messed up his plans for floral delivery today (couldn’t yesterday, ice & snow out here). But after the Starbucks chocolate bar and the lovely card – a girl doesn’t really need more.
maddoctor, my wife’s friends were very impressed. I personally couldn’t believe I was getting away with is. Sometimes creativity is driven by desperation, but the key in such situations is to maintain the illusion that “that was the plan all along”.
RonF,
Quick. Make sure your wife is not reading over your shoulder. You just gave up the ghost!
13 years ago, I took the older two kids (3 and 1) to the babysitter, made a nice steak dinner with dessert and all…met him at the door in my black miniskirt and frilly white blouse…..he got me nothing for VDay, at least that’s what we thought…
two weeks later, I was sick every morning…
and he’s BOUGHT a gift ever since!!! Learned his lesson….
and she’s a lovely young lady, just now developing a figure and an attitude which will make us old VERY quickly…and make some young fella’s life a living hell for a while, in a few years…..probably several, before she finds one tough enough to manage her!
So perform the risk/reward calculus, fellas…we’re not sorry, never have been….but our youngest is a gift which keeps right on……giving? d
Good point doorkeeper. Guess we gotta teach them (or keep reminding them) one way or t’uther
Been together over 12 years now, we’re the old, practical married couple (she’s a former bank VP before being dragged x-country while I play Navy, so she’s keen on wasted $$). While in Fallon, I arranged a mobile oil change on VD morning since her car hadn’t tasted fresh oil in about a year. She thought it was great! My ol’ standby: get her a one-hour massage. Better: include a half-day spa treatment with salon cut. Best: schedule above for a specific day and plan to take care of the kids. Otherwise the gift certificate sometimes sits unused for too long.