You: So how was your flight, Lex?
YHS: Not bad at all, less than three hours. Would have maybe been faster, but being an Air Canada jet we had to do everything in French too.
You: And what did you think of the inflight movie you watched on your personal entertainment system?
YHS: “The Good German“?
You: Yes.
YHS: I thought it was a lovely bit of period work by Steven Soderbergh, who clearly has both the eye for 40′s style film noir – you’ll never see anybody’s face out of the shadows unless maybe he’s about to cop it – and an ear for it as well. The look and feel were note perfect. And while George Clooney didn’t stretch himself much out of his “George Clooney” character, although I found it marvelous strange that the untimely (and off-screen) death of universal hug-puppet Toby Maguire character went so very unlamented, such an out of character part did he play. Also, Kate Blanchett was simply amazing.
You: Have you ever not been amazed by Kate Blanchett, Lex?
YHS: Not as I can clearly recall, gentle reader. She continues to amaze.
You: Well, and is this your first trip to Vancouver, Lex? And how are you finding it?
YHS: It is not, for I came here decades ago as a mere snot-nosed lieutenant back in my days of wine and roses, like. Only substitute “beer” for wine, and “whiskey” for roses. Of course, I do not much remember the place. On account of that whiskey and beer thing, perhaps. It has probably changed a great deal anyway. Still, it seems lovely. Apparently it rains here from time to time, and you do rather miss the authentic color green after living in Sandy Eggo for a while.
You: Were you also amused to see snow still dappling the mountain tops to the east?
YHS: I was. But I have begun to suspect that customs officials are everywhere cloned from one particular pool of officious slowpokes though. Give a man great power and hope that he will use it wisely. Give him just a little and you can be sure that every bit of it will be abused.
You: So what will you do now, Lex? Suit up in your jogging togs and go for a run?
YHS: Actually, I was thinking of going the other way, these being my days of gravitas and wisdom. Only you can substitute “vodka martini” for gravitas, and a “lemon twist” for wisdom, if it do ya. But first I’ve got to register for the 80-pound brain conference – I’m so going to blend in here – before I can get busy on forgetting this trip too.
You: Have fun!
YHS: Thanga. Thanga verr much.
–
Update: If it’s diversity you’re after, you’ve come to the right place. When I was here nearly twenty years ago, the place was as white bread as as a Winn Dixie dairy aisle. Now it seems that every HK$10 that off-shored prior to 1997 was carried east by at least one Chinese citizen, with the odd Korean thrown in to sweeten the kimchee. South Asians are well-represented also. The signs on Robeson Street – one of the main shopping drags – are helpfully translated into English.
This is neither good nor bad. It is what it is.
It seems to be a city where the old and the new do not war against each other, but rather co-exist in a kind of uneasy truce. Plank on frame Victorian gingerbread houses live cheek-by-jowl with adult video stores, and the type of 500 square foot apartment that grandma used to live in back in the day (she called it, “snug”) host 20-somethings who may or may not hope to move up into the mega-condo complex across the street.
Signs here and there maintain fond hopes for something called the “Canucks.” Whatever they are.
–
Update 2: Ah. As always when confused in a strange town, it’s best to seek out the philosophes at the local pub. The “Canucks” it appears are a professional team of “hockey” players. Hockey is a sport that enjoyed quasi-professional status in the US until a 310-day strike in 2004 extinguished whatever remaining interest existed in a game that had for us all of the emotional attachment of indoor soccer, but with less frequent scoring.
By the way, the local beer of the day is Granville Island Honey Lager. Which, despite its hopelessly pretentious name, is actually quite good.
–
Update 3: Anaheim (California. USA.) scores, leading 2-1 now with 9:45 to go in the second of (?) periods. I narrowly avoid getting my ass kicked in a pub filled to overflowing with Vancouver partisans by strategically failing to give a sh!t.
–
Update 4: My insouciant perspicacity is rewarded when Vancouver evens the score at 2-2. I survive to see momentarily exultant Canadians raise their hands in the air, cheering a tie. After a brief and tempestuous tumult, everyone apologizes to everyone else.
Developing.
Update 5: The INFORMS mixer was a complex admixture of a tiny number of truly impressive intellects hard by plenipotentiary alpha math geeks. My waning sense of masculinity is enhanced just from walking through the display floor – this is no mean feat.
I am by habit more accustomed to the “Tailhook” model of professional symposium, where videos of “stuff blowing up” were played in rotation with reels of “bad guys getting flamed.” Season with ramp strike videos to taste. Follow with grievous communal excess. Retch. Repeat.
This symposium – the downstairs bartender asked me if I was one of those math professors – offers to be a trifle more sedate. Although – and take this for what it’s worth – I did espy a certain “pairing off” dynamic amongst the conference attendees.
I tried to picture what the end result of such mathemeticians-gone-wild machinations might be, but no: The mind rebels, language fails. The center cannot hold.
Developing.
It’s worrisome when you have conversations with people and things that aren’t really capable of responding.
I’m just helping you out here a little.
The green of other places is quite startling when you’ve lived in SoCal for a while, isn’t it?
Glad to see you go so far without having to go through any time zones. Should make it a bit easier a trip.
Remember — you’re on foreign soil up there. Enjoy liberty but behave and set a good example for your country.
Also, betcha they serve good coffee and brewskis up there.
Enjoy, Lex,
V/r,
-SJBill
LOL, I have a friend of 25 years, met on a port call, who is one of those crazy canuck fans. Is one of them a short chesty blond?
I’ve always thought Vancouver the most beautiful city in North America. Too bad the weather sucks.
Canuck. A word to be avoided whenst dealing with our cousins from the frozen North, unless of course the subject is hockey and you are referring to a team.
Try this: at the top of your lungs shout “CANADIAN BEER SUCKS!”
Within 5 minutes we will be at war them. Within 10 minutes, Harry Reid will declare that we have lost the war with Canada.
Nose
Lex, have you been drinking again? Snork!
Not that I mind. (hic)
Turns out the Ducks took the game, and the series lead. Lex must be E&E’ing.
Too bad you’re on the road this weekend. Many treasures were turned up at the Coronado booksale. A 1945 pristine set of Freeman’s RE Lee bio, and a 1st edition of Hell in a Very Small Place, plus some lesser lights are now on my bookshelves.
You should warn them Mathmen, and Mathwimmen, about the dangers of assortative mating among smart geeky folks, as you did on yer old blog.
To avoid having non-speaking head-bangers for kids, that theory requires the geeks should not marry naval aviators and plumbers, and such-like folks.
JUST KIDDIN! (have to make the letters big for naval aviators and plumbers)
Umm, “should” marry naval aviators and plumbers. Had a few, m’self. Lex is too smart to be an aviator, he makes sense when he’s been drinking.
ROFLMAO!! First, from Lex’s Update 5, then from JTG’s comments about “mating among smart geeky folks.”
Thanks for the laugh after an exhausting day. I needed it!
In the interests of Clarity, to whom all draftsmen defer, may I aver that I have never had any aviators, nor even plumbers.
Not even female ones.
I was referring to the Adult Beverages.
Lex-
I think you’ll find it’ll be Cate Blanchett as opposed to the more common Kate.
Mathematicians need lov(ing), too!
Nose LOL – you’re right on all counts, I believe
Rick – the whole Canuck thing, we can/will and use the word any time the mood strikes but any non-Canuck types must tread carefully, being wary of not only tone and content but also what particular type of Canuck group they are inhabiting at the time, eh
Enjoy your trip Lex but do tread carefully around the math geeks … sounds like it could be dangerous territory, even for a fighter pilot dude. And next time … go East young man, go East!
Cap’n,
I had the pleasure of visiting Vancouver, Canada some 5 years ago. Played beach volleyball and raced dragon boats followed by many pints of Old Canada.
All in all a typical Canadian visit.
Boring.
Having spent my long-ago youth in Buffalo, NY, I sumit that hockey is a true manly sport. None of those supposed athletes playing professional ‘football’, ‘baseball’ (don’t get me starated on the ‘American League’ game that closely resembles ‘baseball’ and fnally ‘nasketball’ can stand 30 seconds on a rink.
if they can stand at all.
Let alone move without someone pushing them.
GO SABRES!!!!
“…offers to be a trifle more sedate.”
Um, I’d venture to say that the organizers have NO idea who they invited in OHS. I’ll be scanning the news for the next coupla days for disturbances in the NorthWest.
What Seniord said, to wit: Having spent my long-ago youth in Buffalo, NY, I sumit that hockey is a true manly sport.
And like Twain’s death, your report of hockey’s demise is premature, Lex. Having spent ten years in Detroit, aka “Hockeytown,” I agree with Seniord about the manliness of the sport, and can vouch for its continued health in certain quarters. I strongly disagree with the object of Seniord’s hockey affections, however. The Sabres, while the cream of the East and the recipients of The Presidents Trophy by virtue of a tie-breaker, can only come to grief should they survive to the Cup Final.
I harbor great hope for my Beloved Wings, but given that I’m a realist, it will take lots of said hope and not a little luck for them to survive the Sharks, let alone make it to the final. All that said:
GO WINGS!!
I grew up on the fault line between Hockeydom, and the rest of the world. Basicly, anything North of Cleveland meets the requirement to be Hockey country. It is a land where the temperature enforces prolonged bouts of cabin fever treated with alcohol, which fortifies the locals with the courage/lack of judgment to venture out into the weather and onto the ice, where they unload their pent-up aggression on each other under the guise of a game. Heh, it’s as good a reason as any.
Sim, Re #12 above…Well done… and just in time old sport…congratulations on being awarded, by me of course, the Pedantic Peckerwood Award for April, 2007.
A letter explaining the awards rights and privilidges is being forwarded to you under a seperate cover. Best
The best winter ever when it comes to sports was the winter the hockey boys were on strike and we got to watch more college hoops. I noticed the extra hoops but it took a few weeks to realize that hockey wasn’t on.
Any sport where where the participants wear enough pads to double their weights, have uniforms called “sweaters” and share equipment with figure skaters will never take a firm hold in America. Pro basketball players (and college players for that matter) are bigger than hockey players, hit harder, and don’t wear much of anything at all.
I am always impressed by hockey player’s ability to skate, but all in all, I’d rather watch lacrosse.
Okay, bring it on.
Nose
Ahh Snake, a snark just for me… I’ve come over all warm and fuzzy.
All the Chinese came to Vancouver before the sellout handover of Hong Kong by the British in 1997. Now they bounce back and forth under right of return…….
Perspicacity: shrewdness: intelligence manifested by being astute
Love it.
Yes, I looked that one up.
At least I am capable of that.
Army grunts do have a reputation to uphold.
Duh.
Good day.
Hey Sim,
You are in good company.
I received the PPA last month!
Darn!
Now I have to look up astute…..don’t believe I know the meaning of that word
All this math person bashing. *sheesh* I’ll have you know that there were many a guy who wondered if we math geeky women were different behind closed doors. Kinda like that librarian thing… Not that I let any of them know. too much of a geek and all that… Heh!
Bou-
Don’t worry, I’m sure there’s a few of us with College level Math… for better or worse.
Now if I could just find how to use partial derivatives in real life…
Hockey…heh…
I’d say ir’s a good thing that Detroit (ROCK CITY!) has a hockey team, as their foorball team sucks….. Hye, Guess what Matt Millon and the Lions drafted in the first round? A Receiver! Now if they just had a QB and a front 5 to protect him, maybe they’d be able to actually, you know, score a few points this year…
But hockey? If I wanna have a few beers and watch guys beat each other up, I’ll just mosey down to the corner church, er, bar… or the Legion Post. The only time I ever watched any “good” hockey was the movie Slapshot.
And Basketball? Booooring. Watching basketball is like joining the Airforce for adventure. Now, Women’s collegiate hoops, that’s different, but it may be because I’m a guy and all that stuff… but I digress.
Nope… football is America’s sport, it’s true competitive sport. Well, there’s Rodeo and Beer Pong, of course, and I’ve seen some mighty wicked Foosball games, but still and all, football is what America is all about, and it’s the one thing the Canadians have copied and maybe actually improved a mite on…..
Lex, save some of your strength for this coming weekend. heh…
Respects,
MENSA mating rituals:
“How do I love thee? Let me count the decimal places…”
Clue: If you see both their PDAs side by side on the conference table the following day, doing that infrared synch thing, exchanging macro scripts and formulae,
—well then you just KNOW its gotta be fer real.
Well IMO hockey is the best of the American pastimes… basketball being utter junk and football being not far behind.
Of course having lived in Saint Louis I am of course biased toward the Blues.
Lex,
You never flew into Comox on Vancouver Island for an RO1N? If not, another tradition upended by Hornet lack of range..
b2
Was there on the Ranger when we were the last carrier to pull up pierside in 1992 – space requirements for fitting under the bridge.
There were a lot of things I can recall loving about the Navy. Pulling up pierside and departing same in Vancouver was why I joined the Navy…
In particular, manning the rails. I recall one enthusiastic busty lass who, in a motor whale boat hitting the massive wake, lifted her shirt while her boyfriend drove. The sailors threw a shower of white hats down into the water, and the crowd which lined the river cheered like they were at a home game with a fifty yard successful field goal attempt.
Jetman,
There was a similar event here in Bath, when USS Detroit left town. Citizens from far and away lined the banks of the Kennebec, and the rails of the Carlton bridge to see her depart…. they cheered and waved, happy to be rid of her, breathing sighs of relief that she was out of our jurisdiction
Detroit was a remarkable ship inthat it was a wonder the Navy could find enough bail money to keep a crew aboard to staff her. She was only half-jokingly referred to as the Navy’s last Prison Ship, crewmembers learning such skills as would pay dividends later on in new careers as Hockey players.
Urged on by an almost unheard-of collaberation between Bath City residents and their elected officials (Mainers are nothing if not groussable regarding such creatures) Bath iron Works made repairs and renovations to Detroit in remarkable time.
To this day, folks still talk about where they were when Detroit set sail for ports south, in much the same manner as their ancestors did when watching the British Fleet leave American waters after the Revolution…
Respects,
Buck, Tim, Nose and, of course Cap’n Lex,
First, sorry for all the misspellings. I had extreme difficulty seeing the screen with new contacts. The Fiance brought my glasses to me and now I’m good to go.
Ahem (clearing throat noises), it comes to my attention that certain members of this crew seems to have jumped to a non-linear conclusion considering the fate of Lord Stanley’s Cup. It is a foregone conclusion that BUFFALO will bring the Cup home. Those other fellows in Detroit, Vancouver, et al are merely prolonging the inevitable.
I say again my last
GO SABRES!!!!!!
Michelle
Astute is more than a word, it is an SSN: HMS Astute, to be launched on 8 Jun 07.
Cheers
SeniorD,
To clear the decks here, I am in no way endorsing anything from Detroit, excepting certain automobiles from a mid-60′s to early 70′s period known as “muscle cars”. And Motown music, of course… I don’t live there, although I have passed through on occasion.
As to the Sabres… good luck with that. It’ll keep your mind, at least, off the Bills.
Respects,
Excuse me, but is Aw 1 Tim in another stratosphere? How has the CFL, with it’s absurdly wider field and end zones both wide and deep enough to land a B-52 in, improved a mite on the NFL? Be grateful that you’re not exiled here permanently…although the beer is better. Please excuse this rant as I am new to Lex’s world and this is my first time, eh.
PLEASE remove the http thing because I really don’t have a website. I’m only a ring-necked loon and don’t know how.
All gone, Deborah. Your second comment though will have to remain, on account of the ring-neck loon thing. Sorry.
Deborah,
The thing about Canadian Football is that, with the wider field, they also get 12 men, and you can actually RUN the football.
Of coursem being Canada, you almost always have to run the ball, what with all the weather below minimums, blowing snow, flocks of ring-necked loons, etc.
Plus, you can show up with a case of Elsinore and a bag of Donuts and have some fun, eh?
I live in Maine. That usually explains a lot. It’s a lot like Canada, without the Quebecois, and all that curly chest hair, over-gold chains and speedo/thong things they seem to fancy as swimwear. Heh…
Respects,
Oh jeez…so very true, eh. I have French-Canadian heritage and have relatives somewhere in the Mont-reALL area. Also a couple of friends who have migrated down to the states from C eh, N eh, D eh
Seniord @ 34 sez: Ahem (clearing throat noises), it comes to my attention that certain members of this crew seems to have jumped to a non-linear conclusion considering the fate of Lord Stanley?
Seniord @ 34 sez: Ahem (clearing throat noises), it comes to my attention that certain members of this crew seems to have jumped to a non-linear conclusion considering the fate of Lord Stanley’s Cup.
Well, Seniord, your Sabres came close last year and will more than likely repeat said “close but no cigar” performance this year. Maybe.
Credit where credit is due, however: The Sabres have looked pretty good against the East’s eighth and sixth seeds (who, btw, wouldn’t have made the playoffs at all, had they played in the West).
Excuse me, but I have to go say a few prayers and light a candle while contemplating the reasons behind Detroit’s third-period collapse last night…
GO WINGS!!