Send in better clowns

Snapshots from the edge. Welcome to Columbia, Mr. President:

“Mr. President, you exhibit all the signs of a petty and cruel dictator,” Bollinger said, to loud applause.

He said Ahmadinejad’s denial of the Holocaust might fool the illiterate and ignorant.

“When you come to a place like this it makes you simply ridiculous,” Bollinger said. “The truth is that the Holocaust is the most documented event in human history.”

How wude! With the handshakes and formalities out of the way, Ol’ Beady Eyes explained that he’s just been misunderstood:

Ahmadinejad rose, also to applause, and after a religious invocation, said Bollinger’s opening was: “an insult to information and the knowledge of the audience here.”

“There were insults and claims that were incorrect, regretfully,” Ahmadinejad said, accusing Bollinger of offering “unfriendly treatment” under the influence of the U.S. press and politicians.

At least he got applause. Soften the blow of all that opening hostility. Now to go on the attack with some Iranian-style truthiness:

(Ahmadinejad) said women in Iran were “the freest women in the world … They’re active in every level of society.”

Quite true, quite true. Active in politics and medicine, so long as they can keep that filthy hair under wraps. They’re also big in construction. Huge in construction, where you’ll find them hanging around the cranes, or helpfully filling in potholes. That sort of thing.

Yeah, I know. Different strokes. Who are we to judge?

“The people who give this information should see what is the truth and disseminate what is correct,” he said. “I invite everyone in this session to come and visit Iran for themselves.”

Apart for… Well. There aren’t any Jews here? Are there? Because the Iranian government already has some of those.

Students in the crowd helpfully made clear their own distinctions:

Signs in the crowd displayed a range of messages, including one that read “We refuse to choose between Islamic fundamentalism and American imperialism.”

Except I do have to wonder if those were those the only choices? If so it’s OK: Somebody else will end up choosing for them. Someone always does.

Ahmadinejad did try to put the whole 9/11 thing into perspective for us:

Ahmadinejad’s request to lay a wreath at ground zero was denied by city officials and condemned by politicians who said a visit to the site of the 2001 terror attacks would violate sacred ground. Police cited construction and security concerns in denying Ahmadinejad’s request.

“I was interested in expressing my sympathy to the victims of that tragedy and I think that it is the responsibility of all of us to understand the root causes of all events like 9/11,” Ahmadinejad said.

Which is not exactly coming out and saying that we had it coming, but you know: Chickens and roosts.

He declined to answer a question about the taking of hostages from the U.S. embassy in Tehran during Iran’s 1979 Islamic Revolution. He has been accused of a role in the hostage-taking.

“I propose we don’t return to the past,” he said.

That’s right – let’s let bygones be bygones.

Well, that was certainly educational. Best traditions of the academy, etc. Free speech. Next week they’ll be hosting a debate between the truthers and the flat earth types.

Should be fun.