“Down under” has something of a new connotation, in the RAN, and the ADF minister is all hot and bothered about it:
In a statement to Senate estimates yesterday, Defence Minister John Faulkner expressed disappointment that a fresh inquiry was required into allegations that a group of male sailors onboard HMAS Success ran a competition dubbed The Ledger in which bets were placed to have sex with female crew.
The claims, which surfaced last July on the Seven Network, involved bets of differing amounts being placed by male sailors who had challenged each other to have sex with female naval officers or lesbian sailors.
Other dares involved having sex in different locations on the warship including on top of a pool table.
I look forward to a full and open when the next report comes out.
Update: Pool table? On a warship?
I assume the pool table is gimbaled? Otherwise, doesn’t make anymore sense than a pool table on the space shuttle.
Even gimbaled wouldn’t do much good. If the mounts were smooth and loose enough to keep it level in spite of the motion of the ship, then just the weight of the balls could cause it to tip. Not to mention the players resting their hands on it to make a shot.
You know, Joe, you are just a bit analytical sometimes. Hah! Sure do love having you around!
More like a low sense of humor, Mongo. The first thing that came to mind was a guy leaning on the table to make a shot and having it flip over on him, smack him in the back of the head, and the ball cascading over him.
Wicked sense of humor too.
Joe has waaayyy too much time on his hands to think all these things all the way thru…..scarryyy….
Just gimbals wouldn’t do it, unless the table were exactly at the center of rotation of ship about all axes, which just ain’t possible. You’d need gyros, and even so, the balls would feel acceleration (sorry about that) in the plane of the table as the ship moved transiently translationally.
Now, if you just bolted the table to the deck, It would make pool much more sporting, depending on the sea state.
“the weight of the balls could cause it to tip”
Well, if it was in enlisted berthing, fer sure.
There’s a pool table on the shuttles? Who knew?
Well, it would have to be more of a pool _volume_ . You’d need a little bit of spin on the ship, though, or your balls would never come to rest. (relative to the ship)
Maybe a magnetic table with iron balls? We do know that Joe has iron balls, or at least has handled them.
Wooden ships and iron balls??? (shakes his head)
And other than for display, no, I don’t handle iron balls. What I do handle are indeed iron, but just shy of 3 in. diameter and about 10 inches long. Remember, mine has a twist to it.
Oh and http://www.civilwarartillery.com/
Mouse over “field projectiles” then select “rifled projectiles.”
Update on investigations into alleged misconduct in HMAS Success
5 February 2010 Chief of Navy, Vice Admiral Russ Crane: http://www.navy.gov.au/Update_on_investigations_into_alleged_misconduct_in_HMAS_Success
“As would be expected in a modern warship, accommodation and recreation areas are spacious and well designed.” http://www.navy.gov.au/HMAS_Success
HMAS Success is an AOR — not exactly a warship.
Pool table aboard ship: about as useful as a bowling alley.
Being summat in the throes of a fresh bout with the dark master, and notwithstanding the DM and I share a common heritage somewhere way back down the line, my first impulsive thought was “How much to get in the pool?” But, more learned and principled soul that I am these days, I am moved to declare “Very wrong, boys. Very, very wrong indeed!”
I’m betting that never happens in the U.S. Navy. Oops, there’s that word again…wager doesn’t quite work either. Any help out there?
Hah. Reckon?
Reckon works. Thank you, sir!
Yes Mongo, the vagaries of youth become less appealing with age. However, I distincly remember a saloon by the name of MR. Lucky’s on Grand Ave. in Phoenix. On many occasions I witnessed bets being placed, and collected. The object being to see who could get the,,,,,,well, shall we say “least smallest” gal out onto the dance floor for a twirl around the hardwood. At the time it seemed good clean fun for Jim Dandies out about the town. It has been replaced in old age with wagering with oneself on the possibilities of ANY woman under the age of 40 noticing you even exist. Poetic justice.
Stephen
In jolly old England while attending a course at Southwick House the RAF instructors introduced me to the “beefarillo run” where wagers would be placed on a mate’s ability to CARRY said large-framed woman onto the dance floor. Oh my, the things those guys will do for a free beer. When I inquired about the possibility of hurt feelings on the part of the “burden”, they replied “negative attention is better than no attention”.
Do frats still have ‘ugliest date night’?
You guys … tut-tut. I hope that sweet thing [the "full-figured woman"] never reads this blog and finds out about your evil wagers. Talk about hurt feelings! Here she was thinking that some men were like those Texans who like “a little meat over the choice cuts,” as our lawyer was wont to say [when he was still alive and racing sailboats].
Marianne
Does the report identify who won these ‘alleged bets’?
Did the ladies have their own ‘side bets’?
I’ve never heard of ladies betting like that, but I suppose there are some that do so occasionally. They’re probably the same kind of girls who send the ugliest girl they know a secret Valentine. Don’t need a bet to do that, though.
I think it’s a different dynamic with women than men. For men it’s more about what their buddy is willing to do and how good he is at doing it (twisted competition), yes? For girls it’s about how much they can hurt and embarrass the target.
Yes, girls can be evil. Then again, after reading this comment thread I thought to myself: I do love men, but they can be absolutely horrid sometimes.
We’re simple creatures FbL.
You know, the pool table could just be for periods when the ship’s in port and for the people who live aboard. Just saying . . . But, whoa, they get pool tables on their ships down there???
Prowler, you’re being reasonable. You are not helping me drive this comment thread under with stupid ball jokes. Are you just playing pocket pool here, or what?
The pool table is for a game called slosh. It involves no cues, body contact / tackling and throwing the balls to try and sink them. Not a game for the faint hearted or sober people hence the term slosh.
Slosh being a cousin to crud?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Crud_(game)
Sounds like the USAF game of “crud”, which I learned to play at the O Club in Okinawa back in the mid-90s.
I have the bruises still.
Another contribution from our friends “up North”. Guess it is the cold.
First saw it in the UP of Michigan. Rather bored and had to do something to keep from freezing.
In Guam & Okinawa I learned how to really play pool. Did not even require the use of gymbals.
Legend (as passed along at 19 Wing, Comox, in a much-photocopied rules book) is that it was invented in WWII Britain… nationality of inventors not mentioned.
It’s also a wives’ game now (they say ‘lips’ instead of ‘balls’). Still just as rough…
A little ” Frigging in the Rigging”, eh? Not that it doesn’t happen on our US navy ships…Riiighhht..less competitve I bet but you gotta cheer on the Aussies…They go for the gusto…
Some pretty creative minched oaths there SK1 and double entendre’ all around.
Gosh might just darn us all to Heck.
You might just get a visit from Phil, the Prince of Insufficient Light, the ruler of Lower Heck (h/t to Dilbert).
I thought of saying something about calling the ball(s) but that would have been going too far, so I didn’t do that.
At me Alma Mater, the guys in the Corps of Cadets used to host a dance for the ladies of (what used to be) Texas Women’s University for every away SMU football game or away TCU football game, whichever ended up in Dallas/Ft Worth that year. The guys called it the Pig Push. The gals called it the Goon Grab, and wager/betting/reckoning/flat out rolling the fat dice, was prominent and understood amongst the youngsters of each class. Gals who couldn’t get a date were made to feel at least once that year, that they were special, and guys who couldn’t get a date all four years were treated to some of the most spectacular erotic adventures ever. I’m sure gimbaled pol tables figured in more than one of those adventures, as well as industrial strength tractor pulls and M-60 tank suspensions. Good fun for all involved, including the ladies who were far more voracious than average young ladies of that time.
I mourn those days, since Texas Womens has now become North Texas State and is coed. With guys on the campus, there’s little chance a young goon version of me could ever get a date there again. More’s the pity.
Subsunk
Dang, that’s a shame. I hate to see old traditions go, unless they really are horribly evil. Change is bad, mmmkay?
(Sorry, that last was the half-Aspie band nerd,at the Right of the Line with the Colors, talking. “Daughters of Texas” is one of my favorite Sousa marches, written for Texas Women’s.)
Sailors making wagers and preoccupied with sex-I am so suprised
Yeah, OFS, will wonders never cease?
My first guess about the pool table was that it must be a deep draft. Having served on a US AOR, the only problem with a pool table would be the distribution of liquid cargo. Our CO used to scream at the CHENG daily about the degree or 2 of list. We had a liquid cargo officer, who was responsible for monitoring list and moving fuel around to zero it out.
My desk chair was on wheels, and it was always right where I left it, even in heavy seas. We went through a big storm crossing the pond once, with seas around 30 feet. The ship kind of plowed thru the waves, rather than ride over them. It was cool seeing green water over the foc’sle breaking against the front of the superstructure. It was tempting to put in for submarine pay.
Of course, the two CIWS mounts up front did not take kindly to submersion in salt water. Nor to the pounding of the two ready service lockers, after they broke free from the deck and got underway with each green wave, smashing into equipment until they “ran aground” on the non-skid. Good times.